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Canary Jumped the Shark

We Find Unnecessary Quotation Marks “Hilarious”

pottsville pizzeria 3 unnecessary quotation marks

We don’t want to pick on one of our favorite local businesses in Schuylkill County. But as we walked in to Pottsville Pizzeria the other day, we encountered the latest example of unnecessary quotation marks.

We grabbed this quick snapshot before going in to get our “pizza”:

pottsville pizzeria 3 unnecessary quotation marks

Again, this is only the latest example we’ve seen. It’s certainly not the only one in Schuylkill County.

You can find examples of unnecessary quotation marks all over the place.

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Unnecessary Quotation Marks

Typically, quotation marks get used in writing to cite direct quotes from someone. You see them in news articles all the time.

But for some reason, unnecessary quotation marks get used on signs to denote emphasis. But when you read them, it seems to imply that whatever’s placed in quotes isn’t what’s really meant.

Those are the famous “air quotes” you see …

dr evil air quotes

If someone told you they loved you but put air quotes around “love” … would you think they REALLY loved you or think, this person doesn’t love me at all?

So, when you read the sign at Pottsville Pizzeria and imagine the “3” as air quotes around the number and not as quotes being used for emphasis, you have to wonder … Well, do they really mean 3 or is it “3”?

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And like we said, Pottsville Pizzeria is hardly the only culprit in this signage faux pas.

Check out these other hilarious examples of unnecessary quotation marks we found on the internets:

Don’t Forget to “Wash Hands” After Using the Bathroom

wash hands unnecessary quotation marks

Let’s hope the employee doesn’t misinterpret the meaning of this sign despite the totally unnecessary quotation marks around “Wash Hands”.

Is This Bag of Rice Chex Free or “Free”?

Is the bag free or not? Feels like there’s a catch.

Is it Chicken or “Chicken”? That’s a Gamble Few May Take

unnecessary quotation marks

If it’s really chicken, why’s that chicken so happy about serving it?

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Couldn’t Have Said It Better

The schools are usually the first ones to tell you about their excellence. The public usually inserts the air quotes for them. This great school system did the work for the people here.

Maybe She’s Just Big Boned

You’re “pregnant“? Oh, well, “congratulations”.

Mr. So-So Wrench?

The garage specializes in “fixing” your brakes. You’ll find out when you go to slam on the “brake” pedal.

When’s the Last Time You Saw Someone Just Resting in There?

It’s a bathroom but no one takes baths any more. And a public bathroom? That’d be weird, right?

Yeah, “Massage” … Wink Wink

Yeah, we know what’s happening in there. We’re a little more concerned about the reductive part of this “therapy”.

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His Name is Bill

unnecessary quotation marks

Based on his signage, it appears “Ed” has a “problem” with quotation marks.

Whose Car Gets Towed?

Seems like a place for vindictive parkers. Let’s talk about that exclamation point, too.

It’s Clearly a Front for Something

“Honey, I’ll be home late. I’m really “busy” down here at “work“.

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Life is Like a Sack of Peanuts …

unnecessary quotation marks

Don’t be shocked when the vendor hands you a bag of cold, carpetbagging cashews and makes you wait a half-hour to get them.

Coco the Clown Sucks

Coco does magics and makes the balloon animals and plays a round or two of musical chairs, but don’t for a second think you’re going to enjoy it.

Bill Gates Writes Like a Woman

unnecessary quotation marks

This is the room where Fauci holds you down while Bill inserts the microchip.

Sign Says “Trash Can”, We See Floor

unnecessary quotation marks

Normally, we’d condemn littering but it feels like custodial services is just asking for trouble here.

The Book of “Unnecessary Quotation Marks

These are just 15+1 examples of unnecessary quotation marks we could find. There are plenty more. In fact, so many that a “book” was published of them back in 2010.

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You can get it on Amazon by clicking or tapping “here“.

MORE FROM CANARY JUMPED THE SHARK:

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3 Comments

3 Comments

  1. David Deiter

    June 8, 2020 at 5:49 pm

    Your humor is refreshing.

    • admin

      June 8, 2020 at 6:08 pm

      Kinda like eating a whole box of Junior Mints at the same time, ain’t? 😛

  2. David Deiter

    June 8, 2020 at 6:34 pm

    Your satire reminds me of Andy Rooney.

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